Friday, August 22, 2008
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Playoff Roundup
Hello Hammers,
I would classify our performance at the playoffs as sassy and damp, with liberal sprinklings of foolishness. Game one saw us pitted against Crucial Taunt, who handed us our collective asses for the second time in less than a month. Both teams were hindered by the beginnings of the downpour that would follow, and it was a fairly even contest throughout, except when it came to scoring, which they did 10 times and we did once. Our lone tally came just after the horn signalling the impending end of the game, and was celebrated with a degree of enthusiasm generally associated with far greater achievements. AA quietly observed that our opponent may have let up ever so slightly, but we chose to ignore his treasonous lies.
From there we stormed promptly into the consolation round against the formerly inept Screaming Vikings, who proved to be Slippery When Wet, not unlike the great Bon Jovi, whose musical stylings some of the team would attempt later in the evening in front of an X-Box at Jason's stag. The rain soaked field, slick frisbee, and early onset of fatigue complicated things considerably, but in the end we managed to squeak out a victory by a two point margin, which the other captain (Ruley McRulebook) and I agreed to round up to 9-7 in hopes of saving face. I attribute much of our success to the portion of the game in which I walked my son around the field to test my damaged ankle, leaving my team without my defensive ineptitude and sudden inability to throw forehand. AA in inspired us all by running at his normal speed despite having to hold his hips in place with both hands and catch with his teeth. Our female players, as is generally the case, carried the team to victory.
After cramming ourselves in Adam's van for a half hour, we took the field for our final match against Heavy Rotation, who conceded to wear whites in light of our controversial concession earlier in the season. We put on a defensive clinic in that game. On more than one occasion they went 10 minutes without crossing half. The problem was that the slippery disc, coupled with our increasing fatigue, growing ineptitude and indifference, rendered us largely unable to score from short range, and entirely too eager to hurl ill-fated hammers from long range, turning the contest into a laughable example of how not to win. That said, despite the general perception post-game that my suggestion to forfiet the final contest in favour of an early trip to the bar was a good one, I think we all enjoyed the final game. We made it clear that we are just as happy to score three points in spectacular fashion on largely broken plays as we are to score fifteen with prudence and careful design, which is effectively the statement we have been making all year.
All things considered, a good show, and a good season Hammers. Based on our discussions post-game, I expect a good showing for Timmy's on Thursday. When should people arrive Tim?
I would classify our performance at the playoffs as sassy and damp, with liberal sprinklings of foolishness. Game one saw us pitted against Crucial Taunt, who handed us our collective asses for the second time in less than a month. Both teams were hindered by the beginnings of the downpour that would follow, and it was a fairly even contest throughout, except when it came to scoring, which they did 10 times and we did once. Our lone tally came just after the horn signalling the impending end of the game, and was celebrated with a degree of enthusiasm generally associated with far greater achievements. AA quietly observed that our opponent may have let up ever so slightly, but we chose to ignore his treasonous lies.
From there we stormed promptly into the consolation round against the formerly inept Screaming Vikings, who proved to be Slippery When Wet, not unlike the great Bon Jovi, whose musical stylings some of the team would attempt later in the evening in front of an X-Box at Jason's stag. The rain soaked field, slick frisbee, and early onset of fatigue complicated things considerably, but in the end we managed to squeak out a victory by a two point margin, which the other captain (Ruley McRulebook) and I agreed to round up to 9-7 in hopes of saving face. I attribute much of our success to the portion of the game in which I walked my son around the field to test my damaged ankle, leaving my team without my defensive ineptitude and sudden inability to throw forehand. AA in inspired us all by running at his normal speed despite having to hold his hips in place with both hands and catch with his teeth. Our female players, as is generally the case, carried the team to victory.
After cramming ourselves in Adam's van for a half hour, we took the field for our final match against Heavy Rotation, who conceded to wear whites in light of our controversial concession earlier in the season. We put on a defensive clinic in that game. On more than one occasion they went 10 minutes without crossing half. The problem was that the slippery disc, coupled with our increasing fatigue, growing ineptitude and indifference, rendered us largely unable to score from short range, and entirely too eager to hurl ill-fated hammers from long range, turning the contest into a laughable example of how not to win. That said, despite the general perception post-game that my suggestion to forfiet the final contest in favour of an early trip to the bar was a good one, I think we all enjoyed the final game. We made it clear that we are just as happy to score three points in spectacular fashion on largely broken plays as we are to score fifteen with prudence and careful design, which is effectively the statement we have been making all year.
All things considered, a good show, and a good season Hammers. Based on our discussions post-game, I expect a good showing for Timmy's on Thursday. When should people arrive Tim?
Monday, August 18, 2008
I Can't Feel My Legs
Sorry - that is incorrect. I can feel my legs - too much even - and they hurt like holy hell. I am 31 years old and have played sports my entire life. I have hiked Gros Morne and Jasper and Banff. I once dead-lifted my Echo to impress my neighbours and scare the cats. Never have I felt such godawful pain in my legs. No combination of stretching and bananas and Epsom and beer and ketamine (kidding) could relieve the agony from having run flat out for three hours in the unseasonably cold, pouring rain. My body hates me. And I hate Crucial Taunt.
But hey - at least it was fun.
See y'all at Tim's on Thursday? (Tim?)
I leave thee with some motivation for staying active:
But hey - at least it was fun.
See y'all at Tim's on Thursday? (Tim?)
I leave thee with some motivation for staying active:
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Monday, August 11, 2008
Trying to atone for double-guilt
First we lose (badly) on Thursday night, then I find out our last regular-season game is scheduled for the Pit again.
I feel guilty for two reasons: 1) my year-long drops in the end zone (leading Jason to remark that I must eat a lot of pre-game KFC for my hands to be so greasy), and 2) my failure to host the Hammers for post-game beverages despite my proximity to the Commons / Wanderers' Ground.
That said, I'll do what I can to remedy both problems. To bring an end to my case of "the dropsies", I foresee a pre-game meal based on honey and maple syrup for that extra tackiness on my fingers. As for the bevvies, I'd be open to either (or both) of the following:
a) having folks over on Thursday night despite the game being held at the Pit; and/or
b) having everyone over sometime after the playoffs.
We needn't have frisbee to bring us together as friends... right? Thoughts?
Just so you know, the end of each ultimate season makes a certain Richard Marx song reverberate through my noggin like a hangover fuelled by saccharine and sadness:
"Hold on to the night... hold on to the memories...
I wish that I could give you something more... and I could be yours."
Love always,
Tim
I feel guilty for two reasons: 1) my year-long drops in the end zone (leading Jason to remark that I must eat a lot of pre-game KFC for my hands to be so greasy), and 2) my failure to host the Hammers for post-game beverages despite my proximity to the Commons / Wanderers' Ground.
That said, I'll do what I can to remedy both problems. To bring an end to my case of "the dropsies", I foresee a pre-game meal based on honey and maple syrup for that extra tackiness on my fingers. As for the bevvies, I'd be open to either (or both) of the following:
a) having folks over on Thursday night despite the game being held at the Pit; and/or
b) having everyone over sometime after the playoffs.
We needn't have frisbee to bring us together as friends... right? Thoughts?
Just so you know, the end of each ultimate season makes a certain Richard Marx song reverberate through my noggin like a hangover fuelled by saccharine and sadness:
"Hold on to the night... hold on to the memories...
I wish that I could give you something more... and I could be yours."
Love always,
Tim
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Friday, August 1, 2008
Bringing the pain
Lovely stuff last night, folks. Continuous effort, incisive cuts, an intelligent short-passing game... I barely recognized us. I liked it. A lot.
Maybe we lost spirit points for not taking our feet off the pedal, but I've always thought that spirit points were for losers anyway.
Strong kudos to everyone, though I'm awarding the Propellor Honey Wheat Player of the Game to Glenna for suiting up and helping us avoid a default loss. The fact that she knows what she's doing and has been a positive influence on our entire game since playing with us is nice, too.
On a completely different note, here's a link to "20 ways you can die trying to dunk a basketball"... good times: http://www.athlists.com/?p=30
See you Thursday?
Tim
Maybe we lost spirit points for not taking our feet off the pedal, but I've always thought that spirit points were for losers anyway.
Strong kudos to everyone, though I'm awarding the Propellor Honey Wheat Player of the Game to Glenna for suiting up and helping us avoid a default loss. The fact that she knows what she's doing and has been a positive influence on our entire game since playing with us is nice, too.
On a completely different note, here's a link to "20 ways you can die trying to dunk a basketball"... good times: http://www.athlists.com/?p=30
See you Thursday?
Tim
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